Jalan Raya Do’s and Don’ts
Blackcadillac and his Black Garage
The husband is away till the later part of this week, so I decided to pack my bags and do the sleepover thang at my parents’ place in Teban. This works out well for both sides of the family- it gives mine the chance to catch up on lost time with their beloved Sarah (and ME of course hehehe) and for Ramli’s side- a much needed break.
Of course everytime I do a sleepover I lug with me almost everything I and the baby possess. And still, I would find some things missing, which means return trips to my house almost daily. So much for all the ‘lists’ that I prepared, I left the most important thing, that is, my handphone. 
It is such a TIRING WEEK. Thanks to the weekend that was just over.
I am SO not looking to the weekends… the raya visiting is really wearing me out. But then again, I learnt a (painful) lesson last Sunday, after having nearly 30 people gatecrash my place without prior warning. Oh correction. They were told NOT to come but they just aren’t the sort of people who would heed such simple commands.
We were just about ready to leave for Ramli’s aunt’s place, when his mom received a call from someone that they’re ‘on the way’. This after being told that we are leaving. Nice.
She thought there would be about 8 people coming but she was oh-so-wrong. She was actually hospitable enough to put out a plate of fried noodles, a big bowl of beef curry and bread for the uninvited guests. But when we saw the hordes of people streaming through our door, we decided to pull out the fried noodles because it just wouldn’t look nice that we didn’t have enough.
Nevermind that. We did anticipate that there would be kids coming, but we didn’t know we should have kept away Ooyah’s toy cars. This particular brood of kids just decided to treat the toys as if it’s theirs. They crashed into everything, fought over everything, and basically, it was mayhem. I had to stifle my ‘angry-teacher’ scream, wishing I could smack their crummy faces.
Of course not one of the adults did anything. Oh correction again. There was ONE mother who just spoke to her kids LOUDLY from a distance in a semblance of English. “Don’t like that”. “I said no right?” “Stop sekarang.” “Jangan naughty eh listen to me.”
*rolls eyes*
And it doesn’t help that she had that stuck-up face as well, checking me up and down and not even smiling. Yeah, like you SOOO high class with your pungent B.O and all. Hrrmpph.
Akak oiii jangan nak step slang mat salleh ahhh kat sini kak… please lah kak eh… gua takleh angkat ah… lu punya anak ada bersepah tunggang-langgang macam pelesit kat rumah gua, lu jangan nak action Jo Frost kat sini k.
Boy I was visualizing myself spanking that rude boy nice and good. And his mom. Spank spank SPANK.
Instantly, I felt a horrid migraine seep through my veins up my neck. After taking out ALL THE GLASSES THAT WE OWN (that’s how many people there were) and pouring out all but three of the fizzy drinks that we had, I couldn’t take it. I shooed some kids away from lurking around the rooms, and sought refuge in the comfort of my room.
Ooyah came running after me clinging at my baju and feebly muttered, “Kara takut”.
Yes, Ooyah, me too.
Soon after, Ramli too couldn’t take it and ran into the room. We popped a few panadols and watched Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, praying hard inside that the guerillas wouldn’t wreck our study room and good books. Gulp.
Ooyah looked at me, held my hand, and said, “Kara tanak abang gitu”. (I don’t want such a brother- referring to the devil’s spawn boy outside who was wrecking her car and other toys.)
Outside, it was a chaos of screams and howls and shrieks (there were about 5 kids who were under 5, and 1 baby who was crying her lungs out non-stop).
They stayed for an hour (!!!!) and the mess they created was phenomenal. Of course NONE of them thought it would be necessary to help clear up (at least their plates and glasses!)
I have no qualms about having lots of people over to my place- in fact I do enjoy it (when it is PLANNED WELL of course!) but when huge ‘rombongan naik lori’ like this ‘attack’ your place, AND you don’t even KNOW THEM, it is really quite a pain in the ass.
So, let us all be reminded of raya-visiting ettiquette (since it is only the SECOND raya weekend this Saturday, it’s not too late for this):
1) DO call before you come. The reply ‘No, because we’re going out’ means ‘CANNOT COME WHETHER YOU THINK WE ARE LYING OR NOT!’
2) DO NOT visit past 11pm, unless the host begs you to come anyway.
3) DO NOT act hostile/ step eksyen/ stare up and down/ jeling/ sulk/ show fook-face at the hosts because- the relative’s home is NOT Giordano; they are NOT providing a service to you ok.
4) DO watch your kids; playing is fine but destroying someone’s home is not in any culture or civilization.
5) DO NOT lurk around the host’s house. The host’s house is NOT a HDB showflat. If anything at all goes missing, even a sock, we’ll just have to blame YOU for it for the rest of our lives and label your family ’panjang tangan’.
6) DO offer to clear up the mess. Even though the host will probably tell you to ‘just leave the mess there’, they usually don’t mean it- any help is appreciated.
7) REFRAIN from going around visiting in groups of TWENTY AND ABOVE, especially if the host only knows ONE person out of the thirty. It’s really really fun for you but not the host. REALLY really.
REFRAIN from staying over and hour at a relative’s place (unless it’s someone really close to you like, say, YOUR MOM). And for groups above TWENTY, DO NOT stay for more than 30 minutes lest you want to risk the host not giving your fifteen kids ANY MONEY AT ALL. Too bad.
……………………………….
This is Ooyah, still traumatised by the unruly visitors.
Oh boy oh boy. Is it THE WEEKEND ALREADY? *bangs head on wall*
Because
I think this is one of the most beautiful songs every written, in all its simplicity (the lyrics, the melody). Some may think that the lyrics are a bit emo and dramatic, but I think sometimes simple beautiful things do make me want to cry.
But then again (as those who know me well will jolly well tell you hehehe), I cry for the slightest nonsensical thing. Emo lah.
I prefer this version to the original beatles one. Somehow this one is more sombre and beautiful to me.
A dark rainy day like today, no invigilation which means NO STUDENTS… and just marking…
Sigh. Beautiful. 
Because
Because the world is round it turns me on
Because the world is round…
Because the wind is high it blows my mind
Because the wind is high……
Love is all, love is new
Love is all, love is you
Because the sky is blue, it makes me cry
Because the sky is blue…
