Morning Adventures of a Panadol Junkie
I caught the dreadful flu bug from LamRi (that’s how his favourite bunch of people pronounce his name) sometime last week and it’s here to stay. Finally, after being pleaded by the husband (“Pleaaaase, stay at home and rest your tormented body, dear wife, for I cannot bear to see you suffering!”) I went to the doctor on Friday and put the MC he gave me to good use. FIRST time on MC ok. That’s quite a feat.
I have since then finished all the medicine given, and it seems the bug is getting more monstrous. My throat swells up, and swallowing saliva feels like I’m swallowing gravel. I am CONSTANTLY on panadol which eliminates the symptoms for 4 hours at the most. Then it starts again; the swelling, painful throat, the drowsiness, the waterworks…
I woke up this morning feeling as sick as ever- but getting another MC is simply OUT of the question. You see, the last time I was sick, it happened to be the day I’m on duty for band practice. So someone else had to replace me. Today, it’s my turn again- it really won’t be nice if I didn’t come. It’ll look like I am taking MC ON PURPOSE just to skip out on it. Which is NOT TRUE. On top of that, I simply HAVE to submit the Malay papers for printing TODAY, no later. Simply put, I’m just LUCKY.
I dragged myself out of bed and just realized that I had run out of panadol (I have been swallowing A LOT) so that means I have to pop by 7-11 at JP first. I know I wouldn’t last an hour longer without it. And to teach with such a painful throat is simply unthinkable.
As fate has it, there wasn’t ONE SINGLE taxi, hired or otherwise, passing by JP. First I waited at the taxi stand. Nada. Then, the main road. Eventually I had to cross over to the bus stop. Then, it just HAD to rain, not just any normal rain, but a very monsoony rain, complete with torrents of wind. I waited in vain, but NO TAXI was in sight. Two 172s passed me by, but I held on the very frail hope that ONE taxi will come in time.
It was already 7.10.
I gave up. Took the next 172 bus, drenched in rain (which is just what I need to make this flu more dramatic, really). I wanted to smack the very chirpy students who filled up the bus. Why are they so happy anyway??? Do they actually ENJOY not being in bed at 7.10am on a very dark and wet wednesday?
As the bus went along its cemetery route, I saw MANY MANY empty taxis plying the road, from Jalan Bahar to Old Chua Chu Kang Road. MANY. I was cussing under my breath- what the HELL are these drivers thinking? WHO on earth would be stranded , late for work, at the cemetery area at 7 in the morning, in the pouring rain? WHYYYYY look out for passengers HERE? They drive really really slow, looking out into the plots, as if afraid to miss out on that one unfortunate person who was mistakenly pronounced dead, buried, and somehow managed to dig himself out of the grave. Now THAT unfortunate person REALLY needs a cab to go home, doesn’t he?
It simply does not make sense. Do ghouls make better passengers, and has the much talked-about Hell notes appreciated in value now?
I got off at the first sign of human life and civilisation (i.e hdb blocks). It was 7.30. Kids would be seated in the hall already. Darn it.
Finally a cab came by, and after what seemed like eternity, I finally reached The School. I instructed the driver NOT to stop at the foyer (knowing my LUCK, I’m not gonna risk bumping into the VIPs and latecomers held at the foyer) and lead him to a secluded passage, a secret entrance. He chuckled, saying “so funny. teacher late already cannot stop in front of students hor”. I wanted to smack his face really bad but I held myself back. I didn’t find him funny at all.
Sneakily, I entered the staff room. It was 7.35. I could hear Ooyah’s favourite song playing in the hall. No one saw me (or so I thought).
Safe at last!
Moral of the story:
1) TAKE MC if you’re ill, NO MATTER WHAT, or you shall be duly punished in other ways. When He gives you A SIGN, HEED IT.
2) If in dire need of taxi, get your ass to Chua Chu Kang cemetery.
3) Smack the taxi driver if he’s smart-mouthed.
Berita Hairan!
So I was in the taxi on a very wet Wednesday morning, wishing I could be in bed and not on the way to work In my half-conscious state of mind, i got an sms from a friend who used to relief teach in tw. Her message read, “congrats kak fad… you’re my role model now”. I was puzzled of course, wondering what she meant, and knowing for a fact that I didn’t get to update her on my exam results. That was when she told me that I am on the cover, and second page of berita harian.
I was excited of course. When I got to school, a teacher came up to me and said, “HI! I saw you on today’s paper!” Then it started. Students came up to me in swarms, screaming, flailing their arms screaming “CIKGUUU!!! CIKGGUUUU!!!” and I knew then what it felt like to be a rockstar. Well almost.
Apparently, it happened to be one of those days that the school subscribes BH for all it’s students. That’s about 700 people. Gee.
I managed to grab a copy, and saw it. To tell you the truth, it was quite a nice shot (except that my stomach was protruding, and no, I AM not pregnant. I’m just well-endowed in the gastronomy area.)
A few minutes later, I walked into the hall where the students are seated, to take the attendance for my class. It was silent reading time, and there they were, reading the papers which my face was on.
As I walked from back to front, it was not like any other normal day here when I take attendance every morning. Today, I could see the sea of students parting for me to walk, like Moses parting the red sea. Then I heard waves of gasps and muffled screams (it was silent reading afterall) and soon enough, they couldn’t hold it anymore. Excited students started to wave at me, waving the papers in the air, those near enough mouthed “TAHNIAH!” and “CONGRATS!” to me. It was quite chaotic, in a silent way. Malay teachers holding the papers showed their copies to the non-Malay staff around them, and soon enough, almost everyone knew about it.
By god, I felt like a superstar.
I waved my hand to everyone in an Evita Peron kind of way, and blew kisses to the crowd. They squealed in delight, as if touched by an angel.
Okay, so I made that last part up.
Throughout the day, students came up to me, congratulating me. Teachers, Malays and non-Malays, did the same. I practically felt embarrased (in a good way) the whole day. My principal sat with me at lunch, congratulating me and spoke to me about plans that were in the pipeline for me.
Wow. If a picture paints a thousand words… 
I guess the appearance in BH did a lot of good for me. For my career. For my family. It was quite the nice surprise after receiving the award the day before. I didn’t even think any part of it would come out, not even my name-what more a picture. This is because, on the investiture day, the cameraman came a bit late, and the interview had to be done in about 3 minutes because the ceremony was about to start. But somehow or other, it came out, and it’s nice. 
Which reminds me- I have GOT to send out those thank you cards to my lecturers and SGMS for all this wouldn’t have been possible without them.
To everyone who has been so kind as to call me (Asnida), sms me (Hidayah, Maha, Janis, Rohana, Sof, my dear student Akmal), comment here (Nur, Seriwahyuni, Bav, Fauzia, Aznur) simply to congratulate me- THANK YOU so much for your sweet gesture. I am truly touched. It was also that appearance in the papers that initiated an INSTANT meetup with my fh buddies, janis, ms wong, and lailtha. It was great hanging out with you gals, as always…
For those who did not get to see the bloated-tummy pic of me, here it is.
Teacher of the (Y)ear
What have I become?
I am on MC today BUT am surprisingly adamant about coming to school for very admirable reasons. I do surprise myself still. Despite being pleaded by the other half to ’stay at home pleeeeease’, I firmly said ‘NO! I CANNOT NEGLECT MY WORK!’
Wow. Where did that come from?
Since Thursday last week I suddenly had some discomfort in my right ear- I felt some pressure (like being on a plane) and it did not go off. Eventually I discovered that my hearing in that ear has diminished, and I found myself leaning forward and straining to hear the candidates for the oral exam. I worried myself sick of course, wondering if I really have been given my just desserts for always saying ‘pekak ahh dekni’ or ‘pekak betul’ for anything (or anyone) who is…erm… substandard (for want of a better term…) (and actually not deaf). Yikes.
Then it mysteriously dissappeared, as mysteriously as it appeared, over the weekend. But somehow yesterday it started again.
I could actually think of many reasons why I’m experiencing this problem:
1) Having bigger classes, I actually speak much louder than I ever did before. Maybe that messed up the plumbing…
2) The students are THAT noisy.
3) It must be that ‘La la la Kerjalah’ song that I blast into my ears every morning to get me motivated during the busride to work. Dammit. And last but not least, I shall not rule out
4) retribution
I realize how frightening it must be to lose your hearing (or anything, for that matter)…even though one side is still working, it’s just not going to be the same. If the students would one day actually call me ‘cikgu ni pekak’, it would be quite offensive and confusing because it could mean both things then, i.e lousy and deaf. Yikes.
SO I visited the family doctor yesterday who was smiling from ear to ear (pun intended). He somehow found it funny, the way I described the condition of my ear. He looked into it, said that ‘it’s very clean, so no blockage, no damage to eardrums, no infection. It might be a duct that leads to your throat; maybe it’s strained, causing pressure problems…could be due to a recent flu…bla bla bla…
Ok, whatever, as long as I’m not DEAF. Phew.
So apparently it will clear in one or two days. The doctor said that since my ear is soooo clean, he assumes that I clean it everyday (duh) with cotton bud (duhhh) and said that I shouldn’t. So listen up, everyone, DO NOT clean your ears with cotton bud. Leave it to wax, it will ‘drop out naturally’ (gross ahhhh).
BUT being the official ear-cleaner for ooyah, I beg to differ. I get a feeling of (sick) satisfaction when I clean her ears, a certain ’shiok’ factor… (she too, feels the same way). Ooyah’s earwax, if it could be pawned at the goldsmiths, could earn me a considerable fortune. And if I ‘leave it’…. wow…. I really don’t think it will drop out on its own, all 500grams of it.
So I decided to buy Audiclean, something sold at the pharmacies, for my waxing pursuits. No more cotton bud. Sigh.
Is that the bell for lessons?
(Can I claim that I CANNOT hear and thus forget to teach?)
The Tyranny of Tedium
THIS ENTRY WILL BORE YOU TO DEATH, BECAUSE THE ACTUAL BORING HAPPENINGS ACTUALLY DID KILL ME.
And still is…. killlllllingggggg meeeeeee……..
This past week has been so goddamned draining- as if waking up at 5 is not bad enough, the oral exams after school and rehearsals for my school musical AFTER the orals is like icing on the rotten cake.
The oral exams require me to SIT in a very small room, facing students who just go on and on and on with their ermmmssss and uhmmmmmmms. The same passage will be read over and over and over again, and I will ask the same questions over and over again, and of course, hear pretty much the same answer over and over and over again. Do this for four hours continuously, and it’s the perfect recipe for brain damage. Then, multiply this for about eleven days, and you’re on your way to an asylum.
For many days I find myself dragging my feet back home, take a shower, talk a bit to Ooyah and feed her with her daily dose of Elmo, Teletubbies and Wheels on the Bus, and zonk out as soon as ramli comes home to take over. So I basically sleep at 9, sometimes even earlier, and am comatose until the alarm rings again at 5am. Poor Ooyah has been so so so neglected- I practically LOSE CONSCIOUSNESS and do not know what happens as soon as her papa comes home, which is why she is SO happy to see me come home and she’ll scurry from one end of the house to run into my room and simply manja-manja with me. Poor poor ooyah…. 
On the first day, I nearly fainted at the end of the exams-on top of the very small room without windows (i did feel suffocated actually), i hadn’t eaten anything the whole day, and by 6 plus, when we stood up to leave (after sitting for nearly 4 hrs) I felt faint and everything started to spin. I couldn’t even walk and wanted to collapse. My partner had to help me out, and it was only after I got to lie down when I got home that the spinning stopped. Now I make sure I have something substantial to eat before leaving for orals…
It’s only been three days, and I pretty much get a bit cranky (like ooyah) into the second hour of orals everyday. At times, when energy and concentration levels are depleted, I’ll get the ‘best’ candidates who just try very hard to prolong their conversation (and my suffering) by repeating what they say over and over again. I always have to hold myself back from lunging forward and smacking their faces. Sometimes we give them signals that it’s enough and they can stop, but the ‘best’ students just don’t get it and ramble. As soon as they leave the room me and my partner just plonk our heads on our tables and lament about the terrible fate that we have to endure.
Of course there are students who are sincerely trying their best, and we do acknowledge their efforts, but then there are simply too many who just push their luck.
For instance, yesterday I encountered a candidate who, when asked about any kind of sports that she knows of, just REFUSED to answer the question. Claiming that she hates sports, she says she does not know ANY. She couldn’t even turn the whole conversation around to her advantage even after we tried to help her. It was simply a case of ‘I don’t know, so too bad’. I was at the end of my tether and firmly told her- In PE lessons, students are taught different sports. In CCAs in your school, there are sporting activities going on everyday. S’pore is the host for youth olympics. It is impossible that you DO NOT know of any sport; you just have to name a few. She simply shrugged it off, and said that in her school all they do for PE is train for NAPFA test, so, NO- she does not know of any sports and gave us that ‘next question please’ look.
At that point I could picture myself giving her one tight slap on her ‘like reallll’ face. What kind of attitude is that? Despite being tired as hell, we are so accomodating to the students and try to help them out, make them feel comfortable to SPEAK. Being the more impatient examiner (my partner is soooooo demure and gentle…) I then said to her FIRMLY (with a fed up face of course), we are trying to AWARD you marks here, we’re not asking these questions for our benefit. If you do not attempt to save yourself from failure, I don’t see why we should bother.
With that, she grudgingly mentioned a few sports like soccer, swimming yadda yadda yadda. After she left, I thought about the MANY students, who despite their language deficiency (some are not native speakers) TRY all their might to piece up a proper sentence and convince us that they deserve to be credited marks. They are so much deserving of good marks than yer-yer-or MALAY students who think they’re too good for the questions.
Sometimes teachers lament about teaching lower end classes or students from the normal academic or technical streams probably because of their weaker calibre and disciplinary problems, but for myself, I’d much rather teach weaker/ unmotivated/ mischievious students, than intelligent ones who think they’re smarter than their teachers and jolly well make the teachers FEEL that way. I have had some students from the express streams who, no doubt, complete their work well on time and score in exams, but attitude wise, are ‘disrespectful’. On the other hand, I’ve had many students who are notorious for their latecoming/ absenteeism/ playfulness, but in terms of respect for their teacher, they come out tops. You can reprimand them one minute, and the next minute, they will be the ones to offer help in class. They are the ones who will bow their heads down when scolded, and nod apologetically when being advised. AND say sorry after that!
Anyways, on Friday I was actually on duty until SEVEN- even my subject head gasped in horror. But it did not end there- I was back in school on Saturday, albeit starting a biiiiiiiit later (at 9) and horror of horrors, back to school matters on SUNDAY as well, from 12 to 6 (!!!!!!) Being emplaced in the band (as requested) (BANG HEAD ON WALLLLL) they had an out-of-school performance. Sigh.
Nonetheless, having been with the students during their practices actually inspired me to dig into the store room for my clarinet- I will make it a point to NOT be just watching them while they play and actually JOIN THEM. Ha ha ha. I haven’t played the clarinet for almost 10 years now (it’s actually quite silly to be playing it ALONE, so it’s been rotting in the store room.) It’s been SO long that the metal parts are tarnished quite badly, and the wood actually smells OLD. So that’s what I need to do- polish my woodwind instrument and MAKE MUSIC. If I have to devote Wednesdays and Fridays until SIX (!!!!!!) I might as well try to enjoy it right??? (SOMEBODY SHOOT ME!)
I of course tried to make myself feel better that it WAS a good choice to join the band for my CCA, as compared to the Malay dance. As much as I enjoy watching the limber girls moving to melodious traditional malay songs that oh-so make me swoon, I sadly am not able to participate in their practices (and definitely not help them in any way!) SO, at least being in charge of the band- I can participate AND help improve the students’ playing (and ACTUALLY know what I’m talking about!)
I can’t wait for my school’s Pop Yeh Yeh musical to be OVER this friday. We actually appeared in today’s BH (not that I had the luxury of time to read it!) That will be load off my slouching shoulders… hopefully after that and oral, life goes back to normal…. (wed and fridays till 6, anyone?)
